Courtesy of Bastrop Advertiser
Sept. 7, 2021
By Bill McCann
I have an idea for a book, but it may be too far-fetched. It’s part fantasy, fable, and the novel 1984, featuring Big Brother. Or in this case, a cuckoo king. I call it King Lyon and the Pandemic of the Unvaccinated.
The story begins with a virus that mysteriously erupts in the land of the Great Wall. Before the local medicals can stop it, the virus spreads to other lands, including the world’s most powerful kingdom. The kingdom once was called Freeland, but newly crowned King Lyon changes it to Gopland to honor political allies who bought him the throne.
Fearing for his kingly future, King Lyon and his henchmen – and henchwomen – lie about the virus, saying it’s like the flu. No big deal, they say. Those who worship the king believe him. He says it will go away by spring. They believe him. Then he says by fall. They still believe him.
But the virus is relentless. Medicals urge everyone to wear face coverings to keep the virus from spreading, but the king and his henchmen – and henchwomen – call mask-wearers wusses. The king’s worshippers burn their masks. Sadly, hundreds of thousands of people die.
To protect children from catching the virus and spreading it to their families, Instructors in local provinces close the schools and teach the children via their home tubes. This angers the king because he fears losing political power over his subjects. It also angers his toadies who oversee the kingdom’s provinces because they fear the king’s wrath.
The king holds worshipper rallies. Maskless attendees wearing red hats carry the virus into the hinterlands. To distract from his failures, the king spreads false conspiracies and accuses the people of the land of the Great Wall of creating the pandemic to make him look bad. He promotes dangerous home remedies for the virus, including injecting bleach.
Wise medicals work quickly to develop safe vaccines against the virus, building on research conducted for many years on similar viruses. Meanwhile, maskless King Lyon catches the virus from a palace minion and gets so sick his medicals use treatments not readily available to commoners. He recovers but keeps the severity of his sickness secret, afraid he will be called a wuss and lose power.
Power means everything to King Lyon. When the masses spring up and kick him from power, he fights viciously, falsely accusing opponents of cheating him out of the throne. He incites a bloody insurrection by his worshippers. But it fails and he gets banished.
The new leader, King Mojo, acknowledging the pandemic’s severity, immediately initiates a plan to help protect everyone with new vaccines the wise medicals have developed. Millions of people line up to get the vaccines and are saved. But millions of others stubbornly continue to worship the disgraced Lyon and refuse to wear masks and get vaccinated.
Given the opportunity, the virus mutates and becomes more dangerous, causing sickness and death among the unvaccinated. King Mojo pleads for everyone to get vaccinated to end the pandemic. But the pleas fall on deaf ears. Lyon’s worshippers dig in. Some worshippers question the vaccines’ contents, while munching mystery meat on a stick. Others take a horse medicine prescribed by faux medicals rather than get vaccinated. “Give me maskless liberty or give me death,” they whine. Many fall ill from the virus and jam the kingdom’s hospitals. Unfortunately, thousands die weekly.
Trying to revise history, Lyon’s remaining worshippers blame King Mojo for war, pestilence and high gasoline prices. From exile, Lyon and his worshippers, led by a guy who sells cheap bedding, plot his return to the throne. I’m not sure yet how the story will end.
McCann is a contributing columnist for the Advertiser. He is a retired journalist and may be reached at [email protected].
